Insomnia

photo of person holding alarm clock
Photo by Acharaporn Kamornboonyarush on Pexels.com

Insomnia is a funny thing. 

11 pm, and my brain’s like an over excited preteen at a sleepover party. “Let’s stay up all night looooong, girl! I’ll get the snacks!”

3 am like, “You got this! Not even tired yet! What’s next? Read an entire book? Try a new recipe? Run a marathon?” The only time my brain says it’s a good idea to run, mind you.) 

Then 5:45 am breaks in like an unwanted guest. “Aaaah! I didn’t mean to open my eyes! Danger! Undo! Reverse! Go back! Control z! U-tuuuuurn!”

7 am creeps up somehow only 14 seconds later, and my brain has another different personality. This time, with a deeper, angrier voice. “What’s…that…light?! Why is my morning alarm going off in the middle of the night? Morning? It can’t be. It is. Nooooooo! I want to take time in my angry little fist and crunch it into a million little pieces. Until it wails and mourns for what it has done. Woe is meeee!”

My sassy-pants rational brain chimes in, “Sure, blame TIME for not letting you get more sleep—not, say, the 16 oz coffee you chugged at 6 pm like coconut water on a hot day at noon. What did you expect? The heat to kill the caffeine?”💁🏻‍♀️

Noted. 🤦🏻‍♀️

Lord, give me strength. Help me to honor You today even though I’m tired. Help me to pursue loving You and people instead of using my exhaustion as an excuse for lazy, careless, impatient, or rude behavior. Remind me of the true rest I find in You, especially today. And thank You. Thank You for Your endless grace and mercy that covers me. 

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